Penguin in a bar who likes grapes!?
so there was this penguin
he walked into a bar and sat down on a stool. The bartender came over and the penguin said to him in a cute high pitched voice,
got any gwapes?
the man looked at him like he had four eyes and said, err… no. this is a bar!
so the penguin left
the next day, the penguin came back and asked the man:
got any gwapes?
the man replied you were in here yesterday! this is a bar! we don’t have grapes!
so the penguin left
the next day he came back and asked the bartender:
got any gwapes?
the bartender said:
ok look. i don’t know who you are but for the last time I DON’T HAVE ANY GRAPES!!!!! if you come back here one more time and ask for grapes im gonna nail your feet to the floor!!!!!! GOT IT!!!??
so the penguin left.
the next day he came back and asked the bartender:
got any nails???
the bartender annoyingly said .. um no?
then the penguin said:
got any GWAPES!!??
hahaha:)
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Tagged with: bartender • four eyes • grapes • last time • nails • penguin • pitched voice
Filed under: Your Community Center
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LOL!!! Here’s one for you:
A lady went to her priest one day and said, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."
"What do they say?" the priest inquired.
"They say, "Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"
"That’s obscene!" the priest exclaimed – then he thought for a moment.
"You know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to the rectory, and we’ll put them in the cage with Frank and Jacob. My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that awful phrase in no time."
"Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution."
The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest’s house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage, holding rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in the cage with them.
After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: "Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"
There was stunned silence.
Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, "Put the beads away, Frank, our prayers have been answered!"
Aww lol.